jake smith

"come for the infinity sinks, stay for the rooftop bar(s)."

"there’s a corner of the airport where Aaron Rodgers farted after eating an Auntie Ann’s pretzel that’s now sealed in an air tight glass case."

"honestly, a group of monkeys could run a better coffee shop."

"watch out for the awkward employees with Kermit the Frog voices. they often try and push their Christian beliefs on you. oh and they're dicks too."

"feed the wild Wally and receive a mystery coin."

"if you enter the right combination into the soda machine, gold coins will spew from the spout."