LaTruce d'Johnson

"Beware of the Light Saber"

"Try the sweet butter toast! It's the bombest!"

"Free fountain drinks at the food court"

"Under the sink in the restroom is the master Fleshlight. If it's wet, don't use it. If it's dry, use it with lube."

"There was a fly in my soup, and they kept insisting it was seasoning. No, it had wings and legs. Never coming here again."

"STAY AWAY! I was in the restroom, and a worker finished going #2, and didnt wash his hands, then he picked trash from the floor, then went straight to the cabbage and picked them up, then bagged ours!"