Kristian Neumann

"If you walk into the men's restroom, and there's a girl throwing up in there, somethings amiss, because there's no bathroom here"

"Leave a fragrant sprig of thyme beside the hommage to Psylvia McNair, and gasp in dismay at the vomit streak down the middle of your blouse"

"Treat yourself to a nice crispy fried lard lard-wich"

"Leave a tip such as, "cuddle some cats and let them rub their faces all over your stuff; it makes em feel involved""

"Eat some fatty ham hocks that have fallen onto the dirty ground and been covered with cat hair and dirty ass dirt"

"Ride the snake...ride...the snake"